Thursday, November 28, 2013

Tale of Two Cowards: Sammy and Nicole

Since today is the official start of the holiday season I would like to wish you all a wonderful holiday and best wishes to you and your family. I swear that this has been one heck of a year consisting of way more highs than lows. God is Good ( or whom/whatever you believe). Anywho, now that the small talk is out of the way i’ve several things i’d like to chat with you about…

Robert Greene (the GREAT Robert Greene) tells us to never submerge ourselves in another person’s petty squabbles and arguments -- always find a way to remain neutral. In some instances this can seem almost impossible to do so, especially when family is involved. I rarely, if ever, lose my cool even in the most trying of circumstances, and i’m not losing my cool presently. I will simply not allow a lame, no car, gear, or degree having, non-boxing son-of-a-ghettojersey-bitch runamuck and insult those I love. In addition, I refuse to allow his NC, overweight, Prositute (TRUE SHIT), sidekick/girlfriend assist him in his FB/Twitter fuckery. The pair of you aren’t actually worth the 17mins. of effort it takes to pound-out this short blog, but you need a mirror put before you in hopes of you going into introspection and reflection.

First, Samuel, you should never start quarrels with folk that know your business let alone the ability black your eye and straighten your cosmetically challenged teeth. Son, I know you and I know you reasonably well. I remember on a Friday when we first met how lame your jobless ass looked sitting on my sister’s plush leather sofa playing Rock Band. Dirty grey sweatpants (that you STILL OWN and SPORT), dirty socks, dirty white tee just looking all-around sad and dirty. I remember two weeks later you calling me copping pleas NOT to come whip your lame ass for pouring beer on my sister and abusing your wife. Remember, that was the night the Redskins beat Dallas and I kissed your wife like I SAID I would do if the Redskins won … and you did nothing as I suspected your coward ass wouldn’t. I was there when my sister got the restraining order and put your ass out of HER place and you came back with a police escort BEGGING for and Xbox and a change of clothes. Negro, you didn’t have a place to stay, tell me EXACTLY WHERE were you gonna play the Xbox? Mr. Gibson you have no knuckle game whatsoever so I cram to understand why you insist on being a Twitter gangster, Ty Strokes? I venture a guess that because you’re a coward and an abuser you have to resort to such tactics. Oh, and Samuel just because you’re not physically abusing your wife presently doesn't wipe your record clean. NEWSFLASH: Child Neglect is a form of mental abuse also. Yes! You learn something new everyday, don’t you -- well, maybe not YOUR per se.

Nevertheless, your neglect of your two boys result in mental scars that never heal and remain throughout their adult lives. These mental scars are a fast track to low self-esteem and counterproductive habits. Look, buying a kid Call of Duty and an iPod once a year isn’t support of the youngster, especially when he NEEDS A WINTER COAT AND HAS TO WEAR ONE OF MY SISTER’S NORTHFACE JACKETS. Your youngest came over to my crib and I fed him, gave him gear and FRESH KICKS, AND MONEY TO PARTY AT DAVE & BUSTERS the next day. Where was your soft, lame ass? I coached your oldest boy on interview tactics and took him to get his first job and gave him clothes for the movie theater gig. You, my morally challenged friend, wouldn’t even send him a pair of dress socks. *sighing* Alas, I’m beating a dead horse with this exercise, aren’t I? Let’s talk about YOU now, how about that? How is it a 45 year-old man in 2013 has no drivers license and roaches in his apartment? When you DO have a gig you never can manage to send your kids any dough and this perturbs all parties involved. Where’s all the temp job money going, Sammy? You don’t have a whip because you’re so far behind on support no one’s fucking with you. i.e. you can’t get a license. You’re nothing to look at and that’s because you have no gear or orthodontist (no insurance). You live in a rat’s nest of a home in PG County so where do the little nigga coins you make go, Big Pimping? That little porn company you manage is a joke because it’s dominated by your very mediocre escort girlfriend, some other fat chick, and an old white-chick (don’t get me wrong, friends … Kris loves him some white women. Ask Sharon and Mookie). My nephew makes more at his Target gig in two months than you make ALL YEAR. Stop spending your money on Xbox Points, Coffee, and Lupe Fiasco CD’s and do the right thing for once in your useless, uneventful life, B! C’mon, this is getting old, talking shit about my sister and your ex-wife on Twitter. What part of the game is that? Even if they are taunting you with the truth be the bigger man by ignoring them and doing the right thing by your five kids. You being this far behind on child support but buying video games only validates their torment of you. Are you going to be lame all of your life? Lastly, Sammy, if you have a problem you can contact me and we discuss this over some concrete and NOT on Twitter. Man-up, Sammy, and you can even bring your bitch. Speaking of your trollop…

Nicole (Mocha Ecstasy) or whatever your call yourself (what’s your name on backpage again?), who are you to speak anything harsh on ANY member of my family? You should concentrate on taking care of your own dirty-ass kids and giving them a better living environment and female role-model. What type of mother of TEENAGE BOYS brags on Twitter that she’s a felon, prostitute, porn-actress, and smokes weed -- seems like YOUR MOMMA didn’t RAISE YOU in the proper manner, that or your pops fled the scene. It’s sad but I understand the matter: He wishes your mother would have swallowed you and your siblings, as she was directed, instead of trying to be cute and changing the plan. Shit happens, Babes, unfortunately that shit turned out to be YOU. What are your already socially stagnated boys gonna think of YOU when they realize their momma is who she is today? Look, I’m the father of ALL scoundrels and I’m better than no other human-being on this earth (expect Samuel Gibson), but there’s levels to this shit. There’s a difference between a scumbag and an ABSOLUTE scumbag, which you two are. The funny thing is that, like your lame-ass boyfriend, you’re really not trying to straighten anything out -- you type what sounds good, menacing, and profound on Twitter. All talk. I’m too old to condone violence of any type, form, or fashion, but you don’t speak venom on anyone’s deceased parents without facing potential repercussions. Straight Talk. You’re not doing yourself any favor as far as looking like a proper woman, Nicole, and you’re setting an awful example going forward for your kids. Now, I know you’re gonna take to Twitter with rants, insults, and other such tomfoolerly, Fric and Frac. I would suggest that you refrain from such antics. First of all, you’re not gonna take it to the stage for real as the pair of you are Twitter Gangsters. Next, I’m smarter and more educated than the both of you combined, I live MUCH better, I make more money, I’m fresher (check my Instagram), I’m a better cook (did i say I’m smarter?), and your sucker, wife-beater of a man ABSOLUTELY CANNOT WHIP ME. Lastly, I don’t care with you say or think, and I’m gonna be a hypocrite, I say this because I AM better than the BOTH of you lames. You need each other, porn, and Twitter to justify your lowly, dead-end existence. You result to baseless insults to impress your other deviant friends and make them believe you’re something that you aren’t. Cut it out. Nicole, if you didn’t sell pussy online and video yourself giving blow jobs your own mother probably wouldn’t like you. And, Sam … well, no one likes you period. Your mother and brother are proof of that. *sighing*

Well, I sincerely hope that your holiday is peaceful, pleasant, and productive … I really do. I hope you’re angered enough to do some introspection and reflection and cut the bullshit. I don’t need or desire a rebuttal from the pair of you because i simply care. Besides, I would more than likely acquire a headache reading the shit judging by the way you write on Twitter. *laughing* God Bless (If that’s your thing).

The Hedonist

PS - Took me 24mins. but it’s all good…

PS Again - Oh, i didn't mention lame-ass Nicole BLASTED ON TWITTER she had a Chrysler 300 "brought and paid for" all the while it was some negro's ride she was tricking with. Oh, you thought I didn't know about that, huh, Mocha? *laughing* #LAMENESS

Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Misadventures of a Shit Talker -- The Saga Continues.

Dear Family (Real Family, not Overweight, Scamming, Unemployed, Human-Traffickers and others), Friends, Haters, Stalkers, Disgruntled Ex's and their overweight, big-foot girlfriends:  

Please excuse the lapse in quality material as of lately, I really haven't had much to say as of lately. Nevertheless, I do have a NEW BLOG for you to enjoy and new focus ... in other words I'M BACK! ~~~> NEW BLOG (CLEVERHIPPIEHEDONIST) 

I'll do something once a month here but the above is the new spot for laughs, advice, and slick-talk. I would get over there too ... I'm naming names, places in Bowie and other parts of Maryland, and transgressions. See ya there! 

Your Old Pal,

The Hedonist 
Email --

Sunday, March 31, 2013

PSA #1179 for All Religions, Races, Creeds, and Color

*SIGHING* It burns me up when when so-called "smart" people tweet/post inaccurate information to the masses in order to insult a particular group of people. It's even more annoying when this person is a belligerent, grand-standing atheist.

First, Easter isn't "based on the Egyptian God Horus", dumb-ass...Read a book for a change instead of ear-hustling at the coffee house. Easter was originally the celebration of ISHTAR the Assyrian and Babylonian Goddess of Fertility and Sex. Oh, and btw, eggs and rabbits have nothing to do with Horus, Egypt, Christ, or any resurrection. Eggs and Rabbits were (and still are) symbols of fertility and sex. After Constantine decided to take the Roman Empire the Christian route, EASTER (Ishtar) was changed to represent Jesus. True story.

Look, I don't knock what anyone does or who they pray to, peeps. Never have and never will. In my opinion, Easter like Christmas is about children and family, wine and food, warm days and make up sex ... Life's good sh*t. I find it tacky and just plain mean to attack people on their day of religious festivities because you don't believe as they do. Well, believe in nothing in your lame-ass case. It's negroes like you who shouldn't be allowed Facebook and Twitter accounts. Just because them because those Caucasian cats up north giving your slut-ass a little rhythm and running through you doesn't make you anymore attractive than when you left Chocolate City. *laughing* [End of Rant]

In other news, a new line of blogs is dropping this week "The Misadventures of a Shit-Talker" be ready. I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack! :-D <3 br="">
Your Old Pal,

The Hedonist