Sunday, September 5, 2010

Dating Stereotypes 2.0: The Flip Side


So last night after several drinks and viewing some real bizarre interactions with a human and his pet my phone rings with the Kemistry "No Guarantees" Ringtone (GOOD SONG!), it's my sister Sharon. "Uh-oh", I think, "there's a funny Gianluca, Pizzle, or Suge Knight/Farmer Story coming down the pike". Now that I think of it, Suge Knight/Farmer is gonna be a VERY interesting Blog -- a blog about an insecure person whose extremely discomfit about their identity... but that's another RMH Installment.

Okay, where was I? Oh! Yeah, Sissy hits me up to tell me AFTER the fact that she and my cousins Rick and Micki are in the midst of an Awesome Home, Holiday Weekend Party. WTF!?! See how colored-folk do each other? :-/ Moving on, she proceeds to give me a very brief run-down of the night's festivities and I'm excited. But, more importantly, Sharon goes on to praise my FB Notes and Hedonistic Rantings Blog!! How groovy is that, my little hedonists-in-training? I also didn't know that I have an invisible following out there in cyberspace (I'm SURE one of them is the infamous Krista but THAT's ANOTHER Blog *laughing*) who DON'T SUBSCRIBE. Now here comes the catch and it went a little something like this: "Yeah, Bro, the latest blog was an exceptional read!" "Word? For real though?" "You know it was, BUT I did have a few problems that got me heated" "Huh? C'mon, Sis... you know it's all love; I'm just saying what the fellas see out there." "But you need a black woman's point of view since you're doing it in three parts" "But..." Now here comes Micki in the background AND Rick: "Yeah, Kris, you can't just tell it from your view!" *sighing* Good Grief...





Now when I write about interracial dating & relationships, it’s mainly from the perspective of a black man with white women. But interracial dating has many different perspectives. The recent study regarding the rising rates of interracial marriages, still show that the interracial marriage rates among black women are lower than black men. Since I’m not a black woman, I can’t truthfully explain why that is. Maybe black women don’t find white men attractive. Maybe they don’t know any white men well enough to get to know them. Or maybe they are waiting on Matthew McConaughey or David Beckham. Who knows? Basically, I have no clue. But it still makes me wonder why a lot of black women have an issue with interracial dating. Is interracial dating really unfair to black women? I’ve never understood how there is a limited supply of black men compared to men of other races. One thing that I’ve tried to consider is the possibility that the issue might be with the lack of interest from white men. Once again... who knows?
I can’t tell you how many times I have heard that the white women are “taking the only good black men we have.” Get the hell out of here. It was like it was a white woman's fault that a black man with an education or ambition was interested in her. And trust me not every black guy that's interested in white women is an upstanding citizen. Just like not every white guy that has been interested in sistas' has been either. Black women blame white women for a lot of the interracial dating. I don’t like how there is an assumption that white women are stealing their black men... but that's just me. Look, I ain't saying... I'm just saying, ya dig?
The worst part is, is that black women are “allowed” to be upset with white women for dating a black man but if a white woman gets upset with a black women over this topic, they are racist. And I’m sure they get frustrated but they don’t own these men. Black men are free to choose their mates like everyone else. I would have loved to hear what my sisters and sistas' had to contribute before this writing but I received this request at, literally, the 11th Hour. Perhaps, I will drop a 2.5 at another date after some more investigation. As I am writing I am talking to my man Dakota who saying, "Dude, that must be something that has been ingrained for generations, because I have never, ever gotten flack from a white chick for going out with a black girl. And as far as I know, the women of other races don't do it either except for, maybe, Asians... Asian mothers are a trip. I had a friend whose mother was irate because he was dating a WHITE GIRL!" **laughing** I can dig it, Dee... I can dig it. So here I am... trying to give a point of view that I can't possibly be remotely accurate on, but I am determined to keep this series down to 3.5 parts. So, if there may be some who disagree with this particular posting please comment, Inbox me on Facebook; hit me on Twitter (www.twitter.com/just_kristien); or send me an email --> patrickristien@gmail.com
Well, I am going to get me some food, a shower, and start on this Farmer Suge Blog... I have an ax to grind! Stay Groovy!!

The Hedonist